Shattered....

my life the past few days has been interesting...

God has been revealing things to me in ways that I'm not sure how to take, and I'm not sure that I'm ready for, I have to remind myself that God does not give us more than we can handle...
lately I have been wanting to get rid of anything in my life that is not from God, so I'm asked God to show me the things that I need to break free from, and to show me the things that I'm holding on to that I did not give to Him.

And show me He did!!

our God is faithful!!

He did not show me in the ways I expected or the things I expected..

my life was comfortable,
it was good,
it was easy,

I was living in a box...

I went to church and everything was there for me.
my friends, my family, and I got to spent time in worship with God.
I was comfortable living like this.
God showed me there's more to life than this...
and now that we attend another church, I have to make and effort to keep what's important to me- friends and family.
how much do my relationships mean to me, do they mean enough to me to set my things aside and make them work...
and yes I want to keep the relationships that I have build over the years.
so that was a flap open in my box.

and as I walk thru someone dear to me, and try to encourage them and get them to stay strong no matter what life throws at them. and to stand up and live out the role God gave them. it gets hard at times to not give up when they give up.
and then when God shows me things that come from that, things I need to face and break free from.
like physical touch...
I don't do well with that, I'm more comfortable just saying hi to someone, rather than walking across the room and giving them a hug.
and giving them a REAL hug too..
not just a off to the side hug that says nothing, but a hug that speaks love into their life, a hug that lets them know I care about their life. I love receiving those kinds of hugs!
I have a friend who every time I see her, that is the hug I receive... doesn't matter if we don't sit down and talk about life, I know she cares because of her hugs.
I want my daughter to grow up knowing what a hug or a touch feels like, I want her to be able to speak thru that when she has no words to describe the pain or joy she is feeling, I want physical touch to be a part of my family.

so that was another flap open in my box.

so when God showed me the things that I'm holding on to and need to overcome.
some days I would be totally ok with it, because I asked God to reveal them to me, and I know that victory follows!!
and then the next day I would dwell on it and get overwhelmed, thinking,
how can I get rid of all of this?
where do I begin?
if I get rid of this, am I ready for what's next?
and is it really that simple to just say, ok God I give it to you?
Gods grace and mercy is so big.
so YES its that simple!!! praise the Lord.

"that is why we never give up. though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. for our present troubles are small and won't last very long. yet they produce for us a glory that vastly out weighs them and will last forever." 2 Corinthians 4:16-17

and then this week God did not just open another flap in my box,  He SHATTERED it!!!

I feel vulnerable before him,
humbled,
but not scared.
He has taken my comfort zones and shattered them, wanting me to take His hand and trust Him. trust Him to bring Joy, Love, Comfort, into my life. to lead me down a new path.
I now have put my whole trust in Him, because I know that what ever He brings out of this, I need His help, I can not do it on my own.
                    "when in doubt, just take the next small step"

I love to picture this as us reaching out to God, and He is there to help us up...

 

 

going up the stairs is her new favorite thing to do,

 

 

 
 

 

may your week be blessed in many ways...

my brother....

so I got to spend the last couple of days with my brother Michael,
he loves coming over to our house and spending the night. something that I don't do often enough for him. his highlight is hanging out with J.R. and watching sports, for some reason he always seems to cheer for the opposite team that J.R. roots for, and someone bought him a Ravans shirt, and he always wears it at our house knowing J.R. doesn't like the Ravans. :)
we love when he comes over and we can spend some quality time with him, he is one of those people that you have to peel back some layers to see the real Michael. there is some things he struggles with, and one of those is his speech, if your with him a lot you can pick up what he's saying, it is getting a lot better, thanks to Sus who takes him to speech.
an another one is, he has a mind of his own:) which is at times hard to change, and can be frustrating.

but he loves....

he will love you no matter what,
he forgives easily,
he has a heart of gold;
but you have to look for it....

his love language is quality time.
so he does things the best and willingly if you take the time to show him how its done and work along side him,
here are a couple of pictures inside his true heart....
                         giving Bradley a bath

taking the mail up to the mailbox with Keira..

 

 

baking cookies

 
                                                  hanging out with uncle Mike

 

                                          he holds a special place in my heart,

so it got me thinking...

how often do I judge or take someone the wrong way because I took the first 5 minutes that I was with them and went by that, and said that's who they are.

 

really???

 

how do I expect people to have their hearts on their sleeves when I wear mine under a lot of layers?

 

do I see a person for who they really are or am I too busy going my own way and doing my own thing, that I don't have time to stop and chat with someone.

could I be that someone who brightens their day because I took the time to stop and speak life into their lives at that moment,

or am I that person who at the end of the day, people know me as that lady who always has something going, its hard to get a minute with her.....

when I planned to bring Michael over to our house, I also did not plan a lot knowing that if I wanted him to help me with some things I was going to have to work along side of him and help him.

and if you know me that's not one of my strong points, is showing others how to do things and then staying by their side and helping them, I would rather just do it by myself instead of taking the time to show them how.

so is it good for me when he comes over? Yes!

 

so when God gives us a new day, and we get up in the morning, do we have our whole day planned out and then get frustrated when it doesn't go how we had planned it...

 

or do we wake up and give God our day, and roll with the punches, have a mindset of, God you gave me this day, Your will be done...

that's the kind of days I want to live,

the days where I walk into the grocery store and I'm not to consumed with myself that I have time to talk to the lady at the cashier...

or gave someone my smile who didn't have one...

or be that someone who pays the car behind me at the drive thru windows bill..

(I want to bless someone in that way sometime, but when I'm in that moment I always think, ah I will next time..) but what if (they) were the ones that really needed a reminder that life is GOOD!

that life is a gift from God!

 

the message today at church was on humility...

such a good reminder.. he said when we become humble before God and do things for others, we will be exalted.

but we're not to become humble and expect to be exalted.

but to humble ourselves before God, and allow Him to work thru us..

to just serve Him whole heartily....

 

I love when I see or hear of something good someone did, or when someone does something out of the ordinary to bless someone..

those are the thongs that matter in life!

not how clean my house is,

how many friends I have,

the latest fashion,

if my yard looks perfect,

 

so that leads me to the next thing God was laying on my heart,

 

do I look at the things that I do or the people around me do well, as that's just them.

or do I look at it as their gift that God gave them...

and that's why we're so good at it.

like a dear friend of mine, is so good at decorating and her home is always beautiful, do I take the time to recognize that that's her gift?

or my sister who has beautiful flowerbeds, do I just think that it looks like a lot of work and that would so not be me, or do I recognize it as a gift from God,

and the sister that has everything organized, do I wish I could be like her, or do I recognize it as her gift from God,

and the friend that gives compliments, do I see that as her speaking life into people, and recognize it as her gift from God,

and the sister who is always there to help out know matter what, do I wish that I could be free to drop things and help the person in need, or do I recognize it as her gift from God,

and us as women we love beauty...

because that is Gods gift to us, its ok to notice the beauty in things!

so often I tend to think its just us as humans wanting or doing these things, when its the gift that God gave us..

I'm challenged with that lately, to look at things thru the eyes of God... to allow God to work thru me to see the beauty in the things that please him.

so when someone has their yard work and flowerbeds nice every time I see them,

and their home is clean and beautiful,

their closets and rooms are organized, 

to not look at it like that's a lot of work. or they have it all together, but look at it with beauty,

to look at it as a gift from God....

because everyday and every breath is from God. 

 

 

have a blessed week!!